It is said that every journey begins with a first step. This is true in the context of an actual trip and also when embarking on a new way of life. Recently, I had the opportunity to participate in the Camino de Santiago pilgrimage through Spain. My journey began walking out of my front door in Idaho, flying across the US to Spain and then walking 70 miles from Sarria to Santiago de Compostelo. During the six days of walking this pilgrimage, I had the time to reflect, pray for my personal intentions (and those entrusted to me by family and friends) and also experience varying degrees of physical penance. Since my return, I have been considering the many lessons I learned on the Camino and discovered that these lessons apply to many different facets of life, including homeschooling.
Expectations vs. Reality
The first lesson was expectations versus reality. I am an active person and had been working out with focused training in the months preceding the pilgrimage. I also conducted plenty of research, from speaking to others who had done the Camino to spending copious amounts of time studying trail running shoes and endless trips to the runners store for expert assistance. I naively thought with my physical training, my perfect (well-broken-in) shoes and fabulous backpack, this would be an intense but very doable adventure.
Many parents who embark on their homeschool journey do exactly the same: conduct “interviews” with seasoned homeschool parents, read anything they can get their hands on to discover the best way to homeschool and research textbooks in order to find the perfect math program that will help their children succeed in school and ultimately, in life. Yes, they know there will be challenges ahead but very doable challenges.
Despite my preparations, I did not expect a middle school knee injury to resurface and cause intense swelling down my entire leg, which made it impossible to walk without a heavy limp, let alone walk down a flight of stairs or downhill. Fighting back tears on the third morning, I wondered how I would ever make it to Santiago. This incident has reminded me of so many phone calls over the years from overwhelmed and frustrated parents at the beginning of the school year. They did all their homework and picked the best of the best… yet why is it so hard and why are they crying?
I believe it has to do with the expectations we have about an event. Even with intense and thorough planning, the reality is often quite different from what we expected. That amazing running shoe did not protect me from an old injury and that perfect math program may not mesh with your children’s learning style. In this case, we need to have a dose of humility and adjust our attitude. Roll with the punches and make adjustments to accommodate. Which brings me to the next lesson I learned…
Accept Help from Others
Accept help from others! I learned this lesson on a much deeper level than I had planned. In spite of all my training, I was unable to maintain the pace of my fellow pilgrims and had to walk slowly. Very, very slowly. Which for someone who has a long stride and naturally fast gait, was embarrassing and humbling. Thankfully, I learned that several my fellow pilgrims were more than happy to walk slowly with me so that I was not alone. Charity surrounded me and the others were able to exercise this virtue on their pilgrimage.
For the homeschool parent, accept help when it is offered. Perhaps it makes you feel like a failure if you need to hire someone to help you grade or even tutor a student. Maybe you are known as an organized person and feel embarrassed that you need some extra help. You are not failing: you are accepting the reality and making adjustments that will be best for your children and yourself in the long run. If your mother-in-law offers to come and help with housekeeping, take a deep breath, say thank you and let her know how grateful you are for her generosity.
Pace Yourself
Something else I discovered was the importance of pacing. On the first day, I felt amazing and even commented to others that I wished we could go beyond the scheduled stopping point! In the end, I am so glad that I listened to the advice of our Camino guide. He had carefully planned our route and the stopping points based on his many years of professional experience.
In the same way, perhaps you have finished the first few days of school but want to move faster and add some extra-curricular activities. Your children are focused and you want to capitalize on their attention span. Plus, you will finish the school year early, maybe before your other homeschool mom friends! Pace yourself. While it is tempting to charge forward, keep the pace as scheduled and avoid the burnout that may come.
Pack Light
Because I was traveling to another country, I felt the need to bring all of the familiar American accoutrements. Apparently, I didn’t think granola bars or beef jerky would be available in Spanish grocery stores, let alone my favorite toothpaste! This led to a suitcase full of things I did not need or use. Had I pared down my belongings, I would have saved not only my back but also time wasted rummaging through my suitcase. Stick with the basics when purchasing school books and supplies. If you realize you need something later, it will be readily available for purchase. This will also help to keep your school area organized and free of clutter, which will in turn save time.
Evangelize as You Go
Finally, the thing I least expected about the Camino would be the opportunity to evangelize others, even before the pilgrimage began. Several people I encountered—including non-Catholics—had heard of the Camino and were interested to learn more. The lovely lady who sold me the perfect shoes inquired about my adventure and asked so many questions about my reasons for going and what I hoped to accomplish. When she told me she had terminal cancer, I immediately added her to my intention list. Hopefully God’s grace and mercy touched her and she is able to convert. This random evangelization continued during my trip preparations as well as the journey to Spain. How many of these people were lapsed Catholics and were given the inspiration to return to the Church? St. Francis Assisi said to preach always and sometimes, use words. Perhaps hearing of this pilgrimage caused a little spark in these souls, compelling them to learn more about the Camino and Catholicism in general.
The power of example is tremendous. Perhaps the lady at the grocery store will comment on your wonderfully behaved and cheerful children and ask where they go to school. When she hears they are homeschooled, she will correlate their behavior to the lack of negative public school influences. She might share this with family members who will consider this option for their family, especially since they are unhappy with their current school situation. You never know when you will be the spark that causes a chain reaction!
Each day can be a challenge, but if you remember to check your expectations for how you envisioned the school year rather than the reality of the day to day, it can make for a much more positive outlook and allow you to continue on tomorrow. When the grading starts to build at the same time as your laundry, graciously accept help from others and don’t forget to pace yourself. It is a marathon, not a sprint! Keep is simple and don’t allow unnecessary school items to confuse and overwhelm you. Finally, take this as an opportunity to not only raise your children to be saints, but also evangelize others along the way with your good example. While the homeschool journey is sometimes difficult, remember that you are on a pilgrimage with your children. And this pilgrimage is not going to end at an amazing cathedral in Spain but at the even more glorious Kingdom of Heaven.
